


The Impossible Deal

by holysmoaksoliver



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M, Heavy Angst, Speculation, Spoilers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-10
Updated: 2015-03-10
Packaged: 2018-03-17 06:08:16
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,547
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3518279
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/holysmoaksoliver/pseuds/holysmoaksoliver
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver Queen has never had a choice when it came to Felicity.  But choices and deals are different things; and there are some deals one should never have to make.  Spoilers for 3x18 and 3x20.  Speculation fic based on some theories floating around.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Impossible Deal

Jail.

Oliver Queen was in jail.

And it wasn’t just the fact that he was in jail that bothered him so much. He could take a little heat now and again. But he was stuck in jail while Felicity was laying in the hospital. Diggle had just been there to see him, to tell him what was going on. Oliver didn’t care if there was nothing he could do other than just sitting beside her, he needed to be there. He needed to be by her side, making sure she had the best care, making sure everything imaginable that could be done was being done. He would spare no expense.

Oliver and Diggle had made plans for a day like this long ago, on the plane ride back from Russia while Felicity and Lyla slept. They’d discussed the real possibility of one of them being arrested, of how they’d break out if need be.

Felicity was laying dying in the hospital. If ever there was a need-be situation, this was it.

Oliver couldn’t even focus on the anger he felt, on the overwhelming mixture of emotions coursing through him over the thought of her there.

There was only survival now. Only escape. Only adrenaline.

Diggle had promised to speak to Laurel, to convince her to have the county records changed to reflect that he’d been released on bail. Even though Oliver leaving that place would never happen under normal circumstances. Not for what he was in there for this time…

His mind focused on the escape instead of what landed him in there in the first place. He needed a distraction so he wouldn’t picture her laying in a too-bright hospital room with wires attached to her, monitors blipping and beeping and machines helping her breathe. She was always his weakness, always his distraction, always his—

Oliver slammed his fist into the concrete wall of his cell. The physical pain was enough for now, enough to keep his mind on the plan. The guards changed shifts at 11:30. By that time most of the place had quieted down, with minimal staff on the overnight shift. Diggle had gotten a uniform and swiped a keycard when he’d been in visiting Oliver. Oliver knew they wouldn’t let Diggle patrol the cell block alone, but there was enough stock of tranquilizers at the foundry to take out anyone who gave them trouble. John Diggle was risking a lot to break him out of prison. It wasn’t something Oliver was likely to repay him for soon.

Time seemed to alternate between speeding by and moving in slow motion. But finally John appeared at the door to the cell, unlocking it and letting Oliver free. They made their way swiftly to the front door, the hat Diggle had on hiding his face from any security cameras they passed. There was an underground parking structure where they transported everyone in and out of. It was easy enough for Roy to have the getaway van waiting for them when they exited.

But they weren’t counting on one of the guards to show up late for his shift. The man raced toward the van just as Oliver and Diggle jumped inside. The plan they’d been careful to execute, the one that should have given them hours of a head start instead of minutes, was all up in smoke now.

“Call Laurel,” Diggle said, as Roy sped away from the prison. “She needs to be made aware of the situation. She needs to try to talk to her father.”

Oliver sighed. He didn’t care about that. Not now. He could have the entire country’s military after him and all he’d care about was getting to Felicity. But he took the phone from Diggle’s hand anyway. The screen sprang to life under his touch, but before he could call Laurel he noticed a voicemail.

From Felicity.

He clicked on the icon, putting the phone to his ear as he listened to her voice, strained and afraid.

“Oliver, I don’t know how much time I have. You always hear that in movies but you never really think— Listen I just want you to know, that whatever happens. I lo—” The message went dead, finished, cutting off words that he would never know.

Five seconds. The finality of her words being cut off was nearly enough to drive him mad. Taking a deep, steadying breath, Oliver dialed Laurels’ number. When she didn’t answer, he tossed the phone across the van, letting it clatter to the floor. He didn’t need Laurel to fix a mess for him. He needed to see Felicity.

Roy was taking roads too fast, getting them to the hospital as quickly as possible. Oliver had no idea how much time they had before Lance was after him. He was sure Lance would know the first place he would go. And Oliver had to see her before they took him away again.

Diggle’s phone beeped with a text and Oliver could see the man’s face change from panic to something much worse. There was no way to prepare any of them for what it said.

“No,” Oliver whispered hoarsely. He didn’t even need John to tell him. Every word was written in the hunch of his shoulders, the tears welling in his eyes, the clench of his jaw.

“What is it?” Roy demanded. The hospital was the next exit off the highway and they were closing in fast.

“Faster.” Oliver said. He refused to believe it. Refused to let the words root in his soul. He would have to see it with his own eyes. Just like Shado and Tommy and Sara and his mother.

“What happened?” Roy demanded again, the van lurching forward, weaving in and out of traffic, pushing the limits of how fast it would go.

“She’s—” Diggle began, but Oliver put a hand to his shoulder, cutting him off. No one was allowed to speak those words. Not yet. Not until he’d seen it with his own eyes.

“She’s not,” Oliver growled, using his Arrow voice. “I said go faster.”

—-

There was no time for disguises, no time for surveying the lay of the land or figuring out how to make it past security guards. There was only the hail mary. Rush straight on through and hope for the best. Even if there was no hope left at this point.

Roy didn’t even have the van stopped before Oliver was out of it, rushing for the emergency room door. He went to the registration desk first, knowing it was unlikely to get anything from them but needing it just the same. There were too many questions to leave it to chance.

“Felicity Smoak,” he demanded. “She was in room 243. Where is she now.” He used his angry voice, the one usually reserved for thugs and criminals.

“Oliver Queen?” a voice came from behind him and Oliver tensed immediately. He knew who it was without even having to turn. It was the man that did this to her. The reason Felicity was in this place. Ray Palmer.

Oliver turned, shoving Ray backwards against the wall as hard as he could. Ray’s head hit the wall and bounced back, leaving him stunned. It was less than he deserved. Oliver’s hands were fisted in Ray’s shirt and it took every ounce of strength he had not to wail on him right then and there. “Where is she?” he growled.

Ray looked like he was on the verge of tears himself, like Oliver holding him against the wall was the only thing keeping him upright. Oliver could see the guilt in the other man’s eyes.

“Downstairs,” Ray whispered. “They did everything they—”

“That’s not good enough,” Oliver said back. He shoved Ray again, hard, and then let go. He was already drawing attention to himself. “You have thirty minutes,” Oliver said quietly, his voice leveling out again as a plan began forming in his mind. “Your jet will be at hanger #23. It will be gassed up and it will take me wherever I want to go. Or I will kill you. And I will enjoy it.”

Ray nodded furiously, pulling out his phone with shaking hands. But Oliver was already gone, already running down the hall for the closest set of stairs that would take him to the one place he never wanted to see Felicity Smoak.

The morgue.

—-

To his credit, Ray had been smart enough not to be there with his plane at the hanger when they got there. Because for all of Oliver’s strength, there were some things he had never actually prepared himself to see.

They were on the plane, descending down into Nanda Parbat when Roy again tried to urge Oliver to change his mind. But if there was one thing in the entire world that Oliver knew as truth, it was that any world without Felicity in it was one that he would actively choose to not be in as well.

He wouldn’t live without her.

He found himself stroking her hair idly as her body laid across his lap. The blonde spun gold mixed with blood from the impact of the bomb. Ray hadn’t been there to save her. Barry hadn’t been fast enough to stop it. No one had protected the one person that Oliver had sworn to Diggle in the beginning that they could protect.

The words were empty and hollow now, a dim representation of himself and the shell that he’d turned into in the blink of an eye. Because life wasn’t about finding someone you could live with. That was what Felicity taught him through the silent smiles and the quiet resolve. Life was about finding the person you couldn’t live without.

The hours had passed in a mix of mind numbing dread, seething anger and painful realization that his plan may not work. They didn’t need tactical advantages this time. Ra’s men did nothing to stop him from coming in this time. Perhaps because he used the front door, or perhaps because of the lifeless body he carried in his arms. But either way he walked straight into the room where Ra’s held court.

“It isn’t too late,” he whispered in her ear, feeling the weight inside him tighten at the lie of his own words. But Oliver would find a way to keep it from being a lie. He had to.

He held Felicity’s body in his arms, noting how freezing cold she was. And small. God, she was so small. He hated the details he picked up looking down at her like this. The small freckle here or the way her hair caught the light there. Dread washed over him, creating doubt in his mind. Nyssa entered from a door on the side, looking on as Oliver set Felicity’s body on the ground. His jaw clenched, needing to touch her, needing to hold her, needing to not lose contact with her— physical contact was the only thing he had left.

“Mr. Queen,” Nyssa said, her voice bitter. “You have returned.”

“I am here to make a bargain with Ra’s al Ghul,” Oliver said through gritted teeth. “And I am not in a patient mood.”

Nyssa took a step forward to reply.

“You’ve brought me a gift?” Ra’s voice came, smooth and booming at the same time. He stepped forward from the shadows, stopping directly in front of Oliver, Felicity’s body barely separating the two.

“Bring her back,” Oliver demanded.

Ra’s face split in a smile and then he laughed, nearly knocking Oliver backward. Oliver forced his face to remain neutral even though it was clear from him being there alone how much he needed Felicity to live. How much it meant to him. How much he would sacrifice to save her.

“And here I thought you were reconsidering my offer,” Ra’s said, bending down to wrap a finger around Felicity’s hair. “She is very lovely. Or should I say was?”

Anger surged within Oliver, his fists clenching and unclenching to keep himself in check, to keep himself from doing anything stupid like taking on an entire room full of assassins. Even if he knew he would do it. If that’s what it took to save Felicity.

Ra’s stood, looking Oliver over carefully. “Why would I do this for you?” he asked. “When you’ve already made it clear how you feel about the league.”

Oliver hadn’t used the last several hours in the plane to think about this question, even if he should have. He knew that he would need to preset Ra’s with something, but his thoughts were a mess.

“I am sure you know more about my past than most,” Oliver said, feeling himself pull together a bit. “My specialties are far reaching and differ vastly from your own. I have access to things, delicate things, that you may be interested in.”

He paused and Ra’s rounded him, studying Oliver. “You come here and offer me a favor?” Ra’s asked with a laugh. “An IOU?”

Oliver swallowed hard. He knew his talents, his background, his abilities far outweighed what Ra’s was reducing it to. He knew that right now he was at the mercy of a man who had proven over and over that he had none.

There was a long moment of silence when Oliver wondered if Ra’s would kill them all for showing up unannounced a second time. It certainly wouldn’t be out of the realm of possibilities. And there was no way he wanted to be indebted to a man as powerful as Ra’s al Ghul. But there was no other way. There was only this.

“I will take your favor,” Ra’s said softly, gesturing for two of the men to come forward. They moved in, picking Felicity’s body up. Oliver’s instinct was to stop them, but he resisted. He almost thought that was the end of it, but it seemed too easy. And when Ra’s turned back to face Oliver again he felt the weight of it all bearing down on him. “You must understand the league by now Mr. Queen. For everything there is balance. We do not give a life without taking one.”

The words hit him, driving through him like the sword on the mountain top all over again. Deep down, he had known all along this would be the price. And he was prepared to pay it.

“I understand,” Oliver said evenly. “And I am willing to offer—”

“Me,” Roy said, stepping forward.

“No,” Oliver growled, whipping his head to turn and look at Roy. “I will not let you do this. This is my deal.”

Roy stepped forward, passed Oliver, ignoring him. “I am here as payment for her life.”

Oliver grabbed his shoulder, spinning Roy around to face him. “This is not your offer to make. I need you back in Starling. I should have never let you come here in the first place.”

“This sounds like a gift for you Mr. Queen. You get the girl and your life in Starling City,” Ra’s voice was amused, almost taunting.

“Give us a minute please,” Oliver said, looking over Roy’s shoulder at Ra’s. He knew the man’s patience was short. He knew they would have to figure this out quickly before the offer was off the table for good. Ra’s nodded and Oliver’s attention went back to Roy. “You can’t do this.”

Roy’s expression was hard. “No, you’ve got it wrong. You can’t do this.” Oliver was stunned and Roy continued. “When you came back you said that we could do this without you. But you’re wrong. The city doesn’t need some random vigilante running around. It needs the Arrow. It needs you.”

“It’s just a suit—”

“It’s not,” Roy said, shaking his head. “And it’s more than that. You have people that need you. You think Felicity is going to be thankful that you brought her back to life only to kill yourself? And Thea? You have any idea what this is going to do to her? Get your head out of your ass, man. They need you. The city needs you.”

“But what about you?”

“What about me?” Roy huffed, throwing Oliver a smirk. “This is the most selfless thing I’ve ever done. But you have people that need you. Felicity has people that need her. I…” he paused, clearing his throat. “You know, you can do real good out there. And not just as the Arrow. As Oliver Queen. You can do things I never could.”

“I never would have brought you here if I thought—”

“I know. That’s why I never let you think it.”

“Thea needs you too, Roy,” Oliver said, his voice and eyes softening.

“Not as much as she needs you.” Roy turned back toward Ra’s. “I’m offering myself for her life,” he said. And this time Oliver could see Roy’s hand shaking. He could hear the slip of emotion in his voice. And Oliver found himself choking up at the thought of losing Roy.

“You are either very brave or very stupid,” Ra’s said, a glint in his eye. “But I admire your sacrifice.” He paused, stepping toward Roy. “And that is while I will give you a choice. You can die as Roy Harper, or you can allow Roy Harper to die and rise as something else. A new name. A new life, in the league.”

—-

Oliver thought back to how he met Roy. Thought back to all the times he expected Roy to be just another deadbeat petty criminal in the Glades. Thea had always seen more in Roy Harper than that. She’d always seen the man that he could have been. She’d always seen the man that Oliver watched walk off into the abyss of Nanda Parbat after swearing fealty to Ra’s al Ghul.

Diggle and Oliver were forced to wait in a room not unlike the cell they’d been in just a few weeks prior while Ra’s worked whatever magic he had on Felicity. It was the only thing keeping Oliver from going insane or trying to claw his way out of that room. They waited for hours, watching the sun chart its course across the sky from the small, barred window in their cell.

Nyssa was the one to unlock and open the door and Oliver and Diggle were on their feet instantly. Nyssa entered the room, meeting Oliver’s eyes. “She is asleep. I will take you to her.”

There was something in her countenance, in her demeanor that made Oliver pause. Had Nyssa pleaded the same case for Sara? Had the thought ever crossed her mind? Had her father refused?

“Nyssa,” Oliver said quietly, but she didn’t even acknowledge him. Instead, she led them down a hallway that ran the length of the large room where Ra’s held his assemblies. They turned down another smaller corridor and stopped in front of a door that was cracked open. He could see her in there, small frame with blonde curls spilling onto the pillow. Oliver felt his heart pull and tug and tighten when he saw the gentle rise and fall of her chest. She was alive. Felicity Smoak was alive.

But the price they’d been forced to pay. Would she ever forgive him for that?

“I will look after your young friend,” Nyssa said, even though Oliver could see the pain behind her eyes. She was doing it for Sara, not for him. “And I will keep you updated, when I can.”

“Thank you,” Oliver said, placing a hand on Nyssa’s arm. She tensed at the touch but didn’t pull away. Instead she pushed the door open to the room, allowing Oliver access to Felicity at last.

“You should leave with her as soon as possible,” Nyssa said quietly. “My father is not a hospitable man.”

Oliver nodded, glancing back at Diggle. “I’ll make the arrangements with the pilot now.”

Unable to bear the separation any longer, Oliver made his way to Felicity’s bedside. He placed his hand on her wrist, feeling her pulse and then dropped to his knees as if to say a prayer of thanks to whatever deity out there was strong enough to bring her back to him. To conquer death.

“Felicity,” he said quietly, her name familiar on his lips but with a foreign fervor. He pressed his face close to hers, losing himself in the scent of her newly cleaned hair. His cheek rubbed against hers and he found himself fighting back tears that he’d never dared to shed earlier. She was here. She was alive. He was in awe.

She didn’t wake until they were on the plane back home. And even then she did little more than whisper his name before leaning into his side and drifting back off. An almost imperceptible feeling washed over him as Starling came back into view. Despite Roy giving himself to the league and despite all the trials that they were going to have to face in the coming days, with Felicity by his side, Oliver had never felt more fully like the Arrow and never more like Oliver Queen. She made him whole, and that was all he needed to know that they would handle whatever else life threw at them. Together.

**Author's Note:**

> Whew. Did you make it? This was a tough piece for me to get through, even just writing it. I wanted to take a different spin on the 5 seconds thing than everyone else is theorizing. And the deal. That was what really sparked this story to begin with. I wanted Roy to give Oliver a powerful and moving speech. The rest of everything just kind of fell into place from there. Thanks for reading!


End file.
